Friday, March 13, 2009

Not sure how to cope.

I decided to go & see my mom at the jail today. It makes me happy that I at least get to see her, but it makes me sad when she's sad. She's been on a lot of anti-depressants & anti-anxiety drugs for about 13 years. There's one of her anxiety medicines that the jail won't give to her, they said it's 'addictive.' Okay... most drugs like that *are* addictive, but her doctor prescribed it to her, so what right do they have to not let her have it? She told me today she feels like she's going crazy. It's been a month and 10 days that she's been in there. I just don't see how they can deny her of her medicine. It makes me angry, too. Because I see that she's having a hard time dealing with everything right now, and there's not really anything I can do about it. She doesn't know when they're going to do her psychiatric evaluation, she doesn't know when her trial is going to be. Not knowing is driving her crazy, she's just sitting and waiting with no idea about what's going to happen. And it hurts me, because it hurts her. I hate feeling helpless about anything, especially when one of my family members needs help.
The card above is one that I bought to send her. I figured it would make her feel a little bit better at least, or at least make her smile. It's from Very beautiful card, I just got it today. :)
Anyways, thanks for listening. Sometimes i just need to get things off my chest so I can breathe a little easier.


Missy Allets said...

Hey Holly,

Hang in there. Being depressed and all can be tough, but that's also when you need the right people with you. Stay true and loving just like the way you are, and everything will look up soon.

All the best.

PS: Beautiful card with a beautiful message :)

The Queen said...


I'm sorry to hear that your mother isn't doing well. I don't understand why they wouldn't give her her medicine, that just doesn't make sense. Hang in there! I love the card, it's precious.